I never thought I would be here… turning 49, knocking on the door of 50—and still single.
If you had told me, as a young 21-year-old when I became a Christian, that 28 years later I would still be a single woman, I know I wouldn’t have believed it. I’m not even sure I would have continued my journey in Christ if I had known.
Back then, I didn’t really think much about marriage. I would have been satisfied just to have a boyfriend—something that always seemed to elude me throughout my teenage years as I watched others in high school date this person or that person. I lived mostly in my head. I hated my physical appearance. I dreamed about all kinds of pursuits in life.
When I joined the Navy and finally had that special someone, I was fine with settling for that. After we broke up, about a year or two later, I went on a date with another friend turned maybe-this-could-be-something… only to find out a few months later—after being dropped cold turkey, without a single word or explanation—that I was actually the other woman.
So in 2002, the door to dating seemingly closed. What I didn’t know then was that it would stay closed—almost sealed—as I walked from my early twenties into middle age.
Will that door ever open? Who knows.
But I’ve been through a lot—sometimes more than I ever thought I could handle. And through it all, my hope has shifted from being somewhat in Jesus to Him being my only hope in life.